I was once talking to my brother when he mentioned that after 3 years at his last job, he hadn't learned anything. I thought to myself "what a shame." I firmly believe there is something to be learned from every experience. You can't always know when that knowledge will become useful, but that's not to say there isn't value in those insights.
While I don't share this readily with people I manage, I must admit that I learned a good deal about personnel management by taking my dog to obedience training. Not to oversimplify things, but there are some key transferable lessons. When you're teaching a dog, the most effective way to reinforce their behavior is to give rewards (often food) when they do what you want them to do. He comes when you call, he gets a treat. He sits when you ask, he gets a treat. The doorbell rings and he doesn't bark, he gets a treat. People aren't so different, though their rewards come in different forms. Deep down, we all want to feel valued and appreciated. When you see a team member doing what you want, praise them (promptly, and in specific terms). You see a team member take initiative without being told to, tell them how important that is, and that their initiative will set them on a path to excel. You see them send a particularly elegant email, tell them how this is an example of their strong writing skills. Most people feel they don't receive enough feedback, and managers know how difficult it can be to give enough balanced feed (poor performance is so much easier to spot) but as the old saying goes: "you catch more flies with honey." Your team members undoubtedly do things well most of the time, so strive to catch them doing good work and make sure they know why it's good.
I'm just gonna say it. I love Battlestar Galactica. I'm also going to confess that I learned many of my leadership skills by watching it. I began the series soon after becoming a manager, and one of the elements I find most interesting is the way President Roslin and Commander Adama interact between each other to make decisions, and then how they take those decisions to their respective groups they lead. Adama is the classic authoritarian leader - he thinks, decides, and then tells his military subordinates what to do. He makes hard decisions. "Sometimes you have to roll the hard six." He expects everyone to obey, and his leadership unravels when insubordination occurs. In contrast, Roslin is a charismatic consensus-building leader. She lacks the background of a true president and must lead the people by communicating the logic and necessity of the decisions being made - she must build that trust instead of assuming obedience by those she leads. She can't just tell someone what to do, they have to want to do it for her. I encourage you to rewatch the show (do you like how I assume my entire audience has watched BSG?) and look at it in terms of the social interactions at play.
Once you're in the habit of finding leadership examples in puppy class and the sci-fi channel, it becomes much easier to identify the more obvious role models. I have worked with my share of inspirational leaders, and each time I encounter one, I try to study them and ask myself what is so special about them that makes them so effective. Perhaps they're brilliant, but more often (always, actually), it's the things they do, the way they speak, and the times they choose to fight a battle or to stay quiet that really makes those people stand apart. Next time you see a stand-out leader, ask yourself why. These aren't tightly held secrets; their methods are there for everyone to see, if only you're trained to look for it.
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